


























INT. BRIDE’S GETTING READY SUITE – MORNING
Your bestie is aggressively fanning your face so your mascara doesn’t pull a Titanic before the vows. Your mum is crying (already). Your partner is texting you “HOW DO I TIE THIS TIE??”. And somewhere in the chaos, I’m stealthily snapping the good stuff— without requesting “hold the smile for 10 seconds” nonsense.
CUT TO: FAMILY PORTRAITS (AKA THE GREAT RELATIVE HERDING)
Aunt Linda is MIA. Uncle Dave is three champagnes deep and attempting a risky dance move. Your siblings are making faces behind Nanna’s back. And yet—somehow—we’ll get that one shot where no one looks like they’re being held hostage. Magic.
FAST-FORWARD TO THE WEDDING CEREMONY
You’re ugly-crying (elegantly, obviously). Your partner’s hands are shaking so hard the rings could double as tambourines. And that moment when you both realise holy crap, we did it? Yeah, I’m already zoomed in.
FINALLY: THE WEDDING RECEPTION
The dance floor’s a warzone of questionable moves and why is Grandpa breakdancing?? And that sneaky midnight snack run to 7/11 in your wedding dress? I’m there for it.
I’M RJ. I’M RJ. I DON’T DO STIFF. I DON’T DO FAKE. I DON’T MAKE YOU STAND IN AWKWARD POSITIONS WHILE I YELL "LOOK NATURAL!" INSTEAD. I HANG BACK, BLEND IN, AND CATCH THE MOMENTS YOU’LL ACTUALLY CARE ABOUT LATER—MESSY, UNPLANNED, REAL BITS. PHOTOS THAT MAKE YOUR FRIENDS SAY, "YEP, THAT’S SO YOU TWO."
— OUR PASSIONATE ROMANTICS —

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